Why Are Funny Thongs & Boxers Sexier?

I am embarrassed to say that I wore white BVD stretch underwear well into my forties. My mom bought them for me as a kid, and old habits die hard. As years went by, and I was in my late teens and learning about sex, though I would notice strange looks from women, I continued to wear them. Forgive me. I grew up in rural Mississippi. Give an old guy a break.

A few years ago, I started dating a woman who was not known for her shyness. She explained to me that it was a fashion faux pas to wear white stretch underwear briefs and be an adult male at the same time. At first I thought she was joking. She asked me to remove them. I thought it was a ploy to "have her way with me". It was not. It was to take me shopping for fashionable intimate men's apparel. Damn.

My dad used to walk around the house in his loose (pretty bad looking) plain white boxers. This frightened me; not his walking around, but the fact that this might be what has become of me. A middle-aged guy walking around the house in baggy white boxers; I was becoming daddy, and she is she was expediting that process by making me buy loose white boxer shorts." To my pleasant surprise, that was not the case. Yes, there were boxers, but they were tight-fitting designed boxers that felt and looked great. Some were plain boxers but well-designed, some were very brief breifs, but colorful to match my clothing. She made me throw away all my old BVD's which, like an old car or computer, had become my friends, so there was that short grieving process. But it was very short-lived. She liked them so much, she would go on special shopping sprees to find me good looking boxer shorts.

In turn, knowing she liked thongs as opposed to other type underwear for herself, I went on similar sprees. We both became very happy with our own and each other's intimate apparel.

Now I must go off-topic a moment to explain that I am a cartoonist. I make my living by selling my licensed goods on such products as funny tees, mouse pads, aprons, hoodies, and other gifts and collectibles. My cartoon is called Londons Times Cartoons.

Experts tend to feel that adult males and females on the average think about sex a certain numbers of times per day, statistically, but I don't know the exact statistics. I know it is problematic for me not to at least consider it when thinking about or talking about a thong, especially when worn by an attractive female. Is that wrong? And I'm guessing the same thought may go through the average adult female when thinking about a nice looking guy dressed in attractive undergarments.

Of course nobody, especially a male, wants to be laughed at when his underwear is noticed, especially by a female and even more especially by a female he plans to be his soulmate.

One must admit, being a prude or not, sex is not just fun but can be quite funny too. Not sex itself, with all respect I find it a spirtual and even holy act. But the "mating part" the "courting part" reminds me of watching old reruns of "Wild Kingdom". We can be real animals in a way. So does sexy and funny underwear bring out more of the animal in us? I decided to find out and opened a store that sells sexy and funny boxers and thongs with my cartoon images on them online.

A Thong In My Heart has been created online. I opened it last night and orders are already coming in. It sells my cartoon thongs and boxer shorts. People really seem to like them and I'm getting orders and nice emails.

I was thinking of naming it "A Boxer In My Heart" but for some reason I felt it would go over like "A Stint In My Heart".

The thongs and boxers, bearing my cartoon images, to my knowledge, are theonly of their kind on the market and the subject matter of the cartoons are anything from food to Starbucks to pets to dating.

So this Valentine's day, I have no idea what I'm getting, but I know what I'm giving, and I know it's right to be thong. Or something like that.